why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
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