You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
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