he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
Randomize