even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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