Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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