I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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