Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
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