It's Friday. Sex?
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
