whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
