the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
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