It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
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