what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
you will always have a special place in my vag
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
Naked. naked and bneed help.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
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