you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
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