Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
