so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
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He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's not a foreskin expert like you
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
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