U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
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