Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
