i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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