Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
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