i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
Be still, my beating vagina.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
Randomize
