I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
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