just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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