Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
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