Well douche your snatch and let's go!
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
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