Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
Randomize