And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
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