I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
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