She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
Randomize