DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize
