glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I hope mine doesn't look like that
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
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