I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Randomize
