omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
My Higher Power is John Stamos
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
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