If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
Randomize
