So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
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