Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
Randomize
