Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
Randomize
