like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
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She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
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And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
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