real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
This is the prime rib incident all over again
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
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