Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
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