saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
Floor bacon is actually really good
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