everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
