some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
Randomize
