ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
Randomize
