Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
