Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
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