If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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