I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
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