omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
I forgot wine drunk hurts
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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