There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
Randomize
