my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
There was a lot of him and a little penis
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
